No One Likes to be Judged

In this age of social media we are able, more than ever, to loudly and proudly proclaim our views- without helpful context or non-verbal communication.  It’s definitely contributing to people feeling misunderstood, irritated, and angry.

I saw something someone had posted recently that really touched a sore spot for me.  It was in no way directed at me (as far as I know!) but it still felt like I was being judged.  The post made sweeping generalizations about todays crop of kids with diagnoses (read-on the autism spectrum) that they mainly suffered from bad parenting.  Ouch.  Way to judge and dismiss a generation of parents that are doing their best to cope and struggling.  judge

It felt painful.  It made me angry.  It made me sad.  It is so easy to judge.  A lot harder to care and extend a helping hand.

I realize I felt the way I did because I do feel really insecure in this area.  My oldest child is very high-functioning but he has some pretty major behavioral issues.  It isn’t his fault.  It isn’t our fault.  It is just the way his brain is wired.  He probably would have been a very strong willed child regardless, but the autism takes it to a whole new level.  It is definitely a daily struggle.  We have never been permissive or negligent parents in any way, but it would be easy to surmise that we were from a small ‘snapshot’ of his behavior.

For parents that are already giving their all and worrying it isn’t enough- certainly the judgement of people who really don’t have a clue is not particularly helpful.

I wonder if people outside the ‘cookie-cutter’ church going type feel the same.  If they feel judged and dismissed when what they desperately need is some grace.

Jesus came full of truth and grace. John 1:14  God knows we need both.  Grace bridges the gap and truth sets us free.

So the next time we see a glaring (to us) sin or shortcoming let us pray for grace to see the human being behind it.  Maybe some empathy for their hurts, pains, and disappointments that have maybe gotten them tangled up in a mess they can’t get out of.  Grace.  Cause no one likes to be judged.

“For I did not come to judge the world, but to save the world.” John 12:47

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One thought on “No One Likes to be Judged

  1. I sure understand your comments here Sierra. although I didn’t have a child with the same difficulties as you two have, I had that VERY strong willed child!!!! And it wasn’t because of our parenting or maybe even his fault, I will never know the reason behind that behaviour. Parenting is a tough road and blessed road. Reminds me of the story where the disciples asked Jesus why a man was blind, was it his parents fault, no just sin in this world. Makes us all the more hungry for the world when Jesus rules and all sin is gone!

    Liked by 1 person

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